Getting Comfortable Being Uncomfortable

My latest romp into the wild occurred last weekend. Leavenworth was on the menu, but I was very uneasy about trying to boulder with a boot (leading 5.10 is one thing, falling from 6-8 feet while sketching out on a V.3 is another). Besides, the weather was bad on Friday anyway so we just kept driving until we saw the Feathers. The weather in Vantage was overcast and cold, but we managed to get in two amazing pitches before settling down into the back of the old Forester and setting some wood on fire.
This was the first time I felt that death grip enter my body because of the lack of warm blood getting into my extremities. The holds on the first route were cold! A sweet little arête with crimps. Lovely climbing, and I managed to get the send, but my heart was pumping. Next up we got on the super, mega, ultra classic Satan’s Little Helper. It’s the best 5.9 in the state, and it was under our noses the whole time. Nestled in the back corner of the Feathers, this lovely face climb is slightly overhung and ends on a beautiful sequence of flat crimper rails. I was a little more than pumped coming down but very psyched. We fled to the car after this one, seeing as how it was already 8:00 at night.

The next day we rose early and hit the Feathers hard before any of the crowds showed up. I managed to get in 7 pitches, including a really nice 5.10a that started on some amazing holds on bomber rock and ended on an overhang on slightly less desirable rock. Plus, you had to top it out! What a rush it was slinging my foot over the lip and standing on a slanted ramp with my boot as I grunted and growled my way to victory. Despite the ‘loose’ holds on the overhanging part of this route, it was amazing. I also did the best 5.9 in the world 2 or 3 more times because it is just THAT good.

It’s funny. I find myself saying “That was the best route ever!”, or “That might have been the best 5.9 I’ve ever done!” A LOT lately. Slowing down, climbing routes that are below my skill level, and paying attention to details, small sequences, and my surroundings have been some of the most amazing gifts this injury has given me. I have a newfound appreciation for ALL levels of climbing now, and an overall newfound love for climbing period. Before this giant boot was a part of my life, climbing was only fun when I was really pushing myself to achieve some unthinkable feat. A climbing trip was deemed ‘a waste’ if I came away from it with only 5.11’s and below. Now, I’m psyched to just climb anything. Every time I can get to the chains is a chance to rejoice and celebrate the fact that I’m outside, I’m engaged in an activity that I love, in a place that I love, with people that I love (or strongly like). Climbing in itself should be the reward, and climbing at higher levels shouldn’t erase the holism that exists in the experience of climbing. Of course I want to climb hard routes (they are usually the best lines at the crag (define ‘best’ please?!)), but if I can’t I wouldn’t want that to ruin climbing for me. I think what I have realized is that I don’t need to be in the best shape of my life, or climbing the hardest routes I have ever climbed to enjoy and appreciate the act of climbing, and that is true love. I’m not looking at climbing to fulfill some missing piece of me. Self-fulfillment is my job, climbing is just an added bonus.

Back to the trip report. We finished up at the Feathers with another amazing 5.10a on the front side and then saw a big blue van pull into the camp site. It was Joe and Aimee there to accompany us on what was turning out to be a very beautiful day. Lazy white clouds drifted across the bright blue sky, and tufts of green and light green dotted the landscape. Vantage at this time of year is very beautiful and not the dry and dusty hot plate it can normally be during the summer months. It was good to see friends and we immediately set off to the Zig Zag crag. Unfortunately 20 other people had the same idea, a lot earlier than us, so we just kept walking. We got on top of the mesa and I suggested we keep walking along the rim in order to get to a sweet crag I had climbed at last year.

We stumbled upon a descent trail and luckily found the Clearview crag. A stellar little stretch of basalt that is home to some short but sweet sport climbs in the 5.6-5.11 range. It was Aimee’s first time out so Joe got to work showing her the ropes (oh, I do love puns), and I got to work trying to figure out which routes looked doable with one foot. I was a little out of my comfort zone here. Most of the climbs I had done were easy to read, with obvious jugs all over the place. This crag was slightly more confusing. Holds, or potential holds, were everywhere, and they weren’t necessarily all jugs.

I finally just gave up trying to find an ‘easy way out’ and decided to go for this pretty cool looking 5.10c. I was nervous, but as I started the climb I just learned to get in a rhythm, and keep going. Since I have the boot, I don’t really want to take any falls, so my plan of action if I got into a tight spot was to make sure I could always down climb o the last clip. Fortunately, I didn’t have to do that on this route. It started out slow, juggy, and then near the top there were some big pulls on good holds, one big move off of a crimp, and I was shakily clipping the chains. Man! What a confidence booster! 10.c onsight in the boot! I felt amazing, very pumped, but amazing. The sun was ablaze in the sky, with a slight breeze in the air, and I decided to go for another .10c. This one was really bouldery at the start with minimal feet. I fought my way to the second clip utilizing one of the coolest four finger slot features I’ve seen on this type of rock, and just kept going. I made a sketchy clip on a wrap, and then right as I was starting to peel off found a good flat crimp and made it to easier ground. I was even more psyched to have this one in the bag since the start seemed so improbable.

The day was just getting better and better. I sat down with the guide and started head hunting. I saw another .10c farther down the crag that was given 4 stars. I had to do it! This would prove to be the biggest battle, and unfortunately I lost. The line was amazing though. An open book with cool slopey features. I wish I would have been able to utilize the stem in some places because it would have made some spots a lot easier. I managed to get to the top but not without a few down climbs and “Takes!” to rest. Joe and Aimee caught up with us and we went around the corner and did a very interesting 5.9. I say ‘interesting’ because it really made me think, in a good way, about how to unravel the next sequence. I’ve really had to make crucial and sometimes uncomfortable adjustments to the way I view climbs because of my ‘giant plastic robot foot’. I managed the onsight but it was gripping in some places because of how technical it was. The day was winding down. The dogs were getting thirsty, and my pallid skin was starting to look like a boiled lobster.
I checked the guide book one more time and spotted a couple lines to the left of us that looked promising. I sat and stared at the beginning of this 5.11b for what seemed like an eternity before coaxing myself to do it, and believing that I had worked out a one footed sequence. I made the first clip off the ground and then launched into ‘go’ mode. I made it halfway to the next clip before I realized this was not going to happen. I came back down and rested. I tried once more with the same result. The hold I was trying to crank off of was just too stretched for me. I spotted what looked like a sloper from the ground, but it was really the only option I could see that would grant me passage past the opening boulder problem. So, after some hand wringing and much-needed hand holding I broke free from my hesitation and went for it. I pulled through the first series of slimpers and when I got to the point I had been falling at I lunged out right grasping/hoping for a good edge to materialize on top of the slopey feature I was putting all my money on. Success!! It had a nice edge tucked way back on its balding precipice and I clung to it with hawk like strength. I was so scared of falling at this point I shuffled my legs as high as I could get them and stood on the crimpers below. I looked up and right and lurched towards a jug just barely nabbing it by the ear. I made the clip, and moved on to easier ground. The rest of the climb was 5.8, thank god!
I would be more proud of this ascent if it had been a real continuous fight, but it was a pretty typical Vantage 5.11b (meaning it had a boulder problem start to a 5.8). Still, in my condition, I was happy to have this in the bag and to finish off a great trip with another cool send. We had started climbing at 8:30 in the morning. It was now 5:00, and we were ready to head home. I was sad to see the sun setting behind us as we drove straight into the mouth of a rainstorm, but also pleased to have another climbing trip under my belt, and even more pleased with the confidence I had cultivated over the past ten days.
The last two trips to Vantage have been by far some of the most entertaining and morale boosting experiences. I have spent so much time lately laying around healing and feeling like I would never return to normalcy and these trips have been just what the doctor ordered (not literally though)!